Strategy 7: Your Purity (Staying Strong in Your Most Susceptible Places)

• Fervent Reading: Chapter 7, "Your Purity"
• Bible Reading: 1 Jn. 3:2-3, Isaiah 59:1-2, James 4:8, James 5:16  

"If I were your enemy, I'd tempt you toward certain sins, making you believe they are basically (even biologically) unavoidable. I'd study your tendencies and proclivities till I learned the precise conditions that make you the most likely to indulge them. And then I'd strike right there. Again and again. Wear you down. Because if I can't separate you from God forever, I can at least set you at odds with Him for the time being."

Notes from the study:

What is purity? 

When thinking about purity, we often think only in terms of sexual purity—being more careful with what we watch on TV, how we dress, what we talk about, and so on. While this is important, this is only a small part of what purity means for us as believers. Our God is holy—pure, sinless. He can have no fellowship with darkness. Anything that would offend this aspect of His nature would be considered a lack of purity in our lives. However, our purity is not based on how much we sin—a single drop of green dye will discolor a glass of water making it "impure." Nor are we speaking of our lack of sin—that would suggest that we have to achieve perfection and if that were possible, Christ died in vain. God forbid!

"Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when He shall appear, we shall be like Him; for we shall see Him as He is. 

And every man that hath this hope in Him purifieth himself, even as He is pure." 

-I Jn. 3:2-3 

What we are talking about today digs deep down into the soil of our hearts. We are talking about the difference between a Christian whose garden (heart) is NOT being tended to—full of weeds, lack of water—and the Christian who is faithful each day to pull those weeds (confess your sins before God as you seek Him in prayer) and water the soil (read God's Word and live it).  

"Keep your heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." -Proverbs 4:23 

"It is not the cleansing of the hand that makes the Christian (for many a hypocrite can show as fair a hand as he), but the purifying, watching, and right ordering of the heart." -John Flavel, Keeping the Heart

"Unite my heart to fear Thy name." -Psalm 86:11 

The root system is there—both of the Christians in the example above are secure in their status before God and able to come before His presence, but only one (the latter) is pursuing God's path and allowing God the freedom to work and be involved in her life, to answer her prayers and make her life fruitful. 

We cannot fight the laws of nature when it comes to caring for our gardens. Without the proper elements, there will be no fruit. Likewise, we cannot fight the laws of God when it comes to living life. We must desire to live life His way, according to His Word. 

As we see in James 5:16, "Prayers that have power come from a person in pursuit of righteous living" (Fervent). 

Living Life God's Way (Seeking His Presence, His Beauty) 

"One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord [enjoy His presence] all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord [enjoy His goodness and glory in close fellowship with Him]."  -Psalm 27:4 

"When thou said, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto Thee,Thy face, Lord, will I seek." -Psalm 27:8 

"Give unto the Lord the glory due unto His name; worship the Lord in the beauty of holiness." -Psalm 29:2 

"The Lord Jesus found His own strength in God's presence with Him (Isa. 50:6-9), and His strength becomes ours through the Spirit (Phil. 1:18-19). Christ is thus everything to the believer, and the believer's great desire is to be with Him and see His beauty. He taught us to make Him our 'one thing' above all earthly treasure and activities (Ps. 27:4; Luke 10:42; 18:22). The apostle Paul likewise made Christ the 'one thing' he pursued (Phil. 3:8, 13). Let us seek Him in all that we do, and view all His good gifts as valuable only insofar as they help us to glorify and enjoy Him. What practical difference would it make in your life if you began to pursue Christ with this single-minded focus?" 

-Quote taken from Reformation Heritage Study Bible, "Thoughts for Personal/Family Worship: Psalm 27"

Satan is working hard to tempt us in our areas of struggle in order to divide us from this presence of God in our lives. 

Besetting sins…those nagging areas of your life that you wish you could change about yourself, but struggle to gain victory over. They are your weakest points. Your struggles. Your default setting when you are not yielded to the Lord in prayer and His Word. Things such as…Worry. Anger. Criticism. Unkind words. Impatience. Selfishness. Unhappiness. Lack of respect for our husbands. Neglect of the Word. And so on. The list is different for each of as. And none of our lists is more beautiful than the other. Sin is ugly in any form. And, it is keeping us from a vibrant relationship with our God. 

• What sin(s)/sinful habit (whether a specific action or an attitude) do you struggle the most to change and gain victory over?  

Paul knew of this struggle with the flesh. He says in Romans 7: 

"For what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I…For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do." 

Often we find ourselves making the same mistakes in our day. Reacting in the same negative way with our children. Getting on our husbands AGAIN. Choosing a grouchy spirit over joy. Stressing over the finances, rather than depending on God. Or, whatever. And here is the most devastating result of it all:

"Behold, the Lord's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear: But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid His face from you, that He will not hear." -Isaiah 59:1-2

Our holy God cannot hear, cannot answer our prayers, because He cannot fellowship with unrighteousness. Our prayer rooms suddenly feel like they have "soundproof walls," as Priscilla puts it. 

"If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me." -Psalm 66:18

One area where Satan works hard to threaten our purity (i.e. where our lives are aligned with the teaching of Scripture and the transforming work of God's Spirit) and thus create a divide in our walk with God is in our marriages. He tempts us to make excuses, to justify, to compare, rather than to simply, singlemindedly love our husband and honor Him as God has wisely and lovingly commanded us to do in His Word.

In "The Battle Plan for Prayer," the Kendrick brothers discuss ten "Locks of Prayer" that restrict the freedom and effectiveness of our prayers. Number seven on their list really stood out to me in regards to this lesson on purity:

7. Praying while mistreating your spouse. When we're not treating with love and respect the one person in our life whom we've vowed to treat with love and respect, God makes special mention of it as an inhibitor to prayer. His warning is primarily to men: "Husbands…live with your wives in an understanding way…and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered" (I Peter 3:7). But the same principle obviously cuts both ways. How can we expect to be at peace with God in prayer when we are sowing disunity in our own homes? Being ugly to our wives (or husbands) is a backbreaker in prayer. 

As we show honor to our husband, we show honor to our God. We live according to God's design for us. We basically say, "Lord, regardless of what my husband does or says, I am going to live right before You." James 3:18 says, "The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace." Rather than sowing disunity in our homes and speaking rashly with our husband, we respond with "wisdom from above," according to verse 17, that is… 

"first pure, 

then peaceable, 

gentle, and easy to be intreated [easy to live with!], 

full of mercy and good fruits, 

without partiality [singleminded; see James 4:8], 

and without hypocrisy [sincere]."

• Write a prayer card for where you struggle to show honor to your husband or where disunity threatens to hinder your prayers. Write specific verses that can help you claim victory in these areas.

A Challenge for this Week:

I want to challenge us all—including myself—to honor God this week by whole-heartedly (with complete sincerity and commitment) honoring our husbands. In other words, we are not honoring our husband so that he will in turn treat us better or be more loving toward us. We are not showing love to our husband so that we can feel better about ourselves as a wife. We are pouring our hearts out in full commitment for the purpose of bringing glory to our God. Whether our husbands notice or we receive anything in return should not matter. 

Our goal is God's glory. 

Isn't that how we should be living anyway? Isn't that pure, righteous living? You see, to live pure does not mean to live in perfection. Or, we would all be in trouble! Our standing before God is complete (Read the verses on pages 129-130 in this chapter). We can come to God in prayer anytime, clothed in the righteousness of Christ. But, to live purely means to live with the right purpose—proclaiming God's glory. And the only way to show Him glory is according to His design. God could not accept Cain's fruit offering. An animal sacrifice was what He required. God is not glorified through good intentions. God is glorified through the heart that seeks Him in His Word and lives to honor what He says. 

Look at Moses. He made plenty of mistakes—he murdered a man, he was hesitant to take the role God assigned to him, he often lost his patience and displayed anger with the Israelites and in the end his disobedience to the Lord's instruction cost him final entrance into God's chosen land for His people. Yet we read in Hebrews 3:1-2 that "Moses was faithful in all God's house."

"[Moses] was not perfect, but he was purposeful. He wasn't without mistake, but he was marked by God's presence. He marched to a higher standard, an overriding and compelling force that drew him to desire what mattered to His God more than what mattered to other people." -The Resolution for Woman, Priscilla Shearer. 

Are you up for it? The challenge.

We are tired. The kids are full of needs. The house is in a state. Our husbands can sometimes ask for the ridiculous. But all of these things are secondary to our calling from God to love and serve our husbands. To be his helpmeet. Let us set aside everything else this week. This will be our primary focus. To the praise of His glory! 

So, let's get started… 

• Write a list of things you can do this week to show honor to your husband (specifically things that you know are important to him - not things that just make you feel like a good wife. For example, I know my husband loves when I get up in the morning and make breakfast for him. So that will be on my list! This is the time to do those ridiculous things that he wants from you that you never saw sense in before. Or, those things that he doesn't ask of you now that you are busy with the kids, but you know it would mean the world to him).

• Commit this list to God. Ask for His strength. Tell God of your desire to honor Him. 

• Pray each morning for the Holy Spirit to help you see what your husband needs that day. Then, pray for your husband. 

• Wake up with a smile for your husband. And go to sleep with a smile. This is a week where we try to say nothing negative, no griping, no complaining. Consider this a vacation for your husband. A week where he can rest as you focus all your attention on God's glory rather than your own!

Warning: Do not expect for your husband to respond in kind. This is not about improving your marriage. This is about honoring God. And, do not expect this to be easy. When you fail (like when I oversleep and don't make his breakfast!), consider it a neglect against God—go to God in prayer, confess it and ask Him for His strength to do better tomorrow. When you seek to honor God alone, He will strengthen you for that which you have committed to Him.

"Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to pass." -Psalm 37:5 

Whether our struggles with sin are with our husbands, our children, our circumstances, we must daily bring these sins before our holy God—confessing them and seeking His strength to overcome. Then, our prayers will be heard and our lives will have peace and the presence of God. "And the work of righteousness shall be peace and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance forever" (Isaiah 32:17).  

In the Battle Plan for Prayer, the Kendrick brothers also list ten "Keys of Prayer." Number 9 really stood out to me in regard to this lesson:

9. Praying while abiding in Christ and His Word. Jesus said, "If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you" (John 15:7). Abiding means staying in close fellowship with someone. It involves spending time in God's Word, allowing it to fill our hearts and guide our thinking, walking in obedience to what He tells us to do (John 15:10), receiving God's love, then pouring it back out on Him and the people around us (John 15:9,12). Lastly, abiding means staying clean before God (John 15:3; I John 1:9) by not allowing "ungodliness" or sin to build up or go unconfessed. It is within this context that our prayer lives are opened up into a fresh vibrancy, fruitfulness, and effectiveness before God (John 15:5). John 15:7 implies that abiding in this way opens up our prayers to also ask for good things that our hearts desire.

So if our God does not demand perfection, what does he require? According to Micah 5:8, "What does the Lord require of you, but…

To do justly,

To love mercy,

To walk humbly with your God." 

Before Next Week:

• Read Chapter 8 in Fervent: "Your Pressures" 
• Write prayer card for the chapter
• Pray!